The fist clenched round my heart
loosens a little, and I gasp
brightness; but it tightens
again. When have I ever not loved
the pain of love? But this has moved
past love to mania. This has the strong
clench of the madman, this is
gripping the ledge of unreason, before
plunging howling into the abyss.
Hold hard then, heart. This way at least you live.
-Walcott
I came across this poem today and I fell in love with it the moment the words were introduced to my thoughts. I guess I just like it because it goes along perfectly with everything I've been learning recently. Love is insane, it's madness, it goes against every natural instinct, and yet we long to taste its sweetness in our lives. Love causes us to forget ourselves. Love causes us to put ourselves last. Love causes us to act and think in ways that don't go along with the animalistic thought processes of self preservation. And yet, love is what makes life worth living.
The people we love have the power to hurt us because we give them a part of us. And before we even realize it, our heart is in a hundred fragmented pieces and resides with a hundred different people. But what we don't realize is this: the more fragmented and scattered the pieces of our hearts are, the more whole we become. Our purpose is to love. And when we allow ourselves to do that, we discover what it truly means to live.
So in the end, it's worth all the pain we may experience. All the unkind words uttered in moments of anger, all the disagreements, all the fights, all the hurt feelings, all the sadness, and all the missing. Because despite the difficulties we may come across in our journey to love the people in our lives, when we continue to love, and when we continue to put the well-being of others before ourselves, and when we continue to lift up those around us, then love will carry us through anything we may be forced to struggle through. In the end, love will eventually put us right where we want to be.
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