free

I'm a builder.

Whenever a stranger comes near an instant wall goes up around me.

To scare them off if their only out to hurt me.

Or to bring them closer if they only wish to be there for me.

Cause I've know all my life

those who really want to be a part of your life,

a simple wall won't stop them.

Until he came along,

with a power of his own.

He had more strength than it took from me to build the wall.

And so.

With every step he took closer.

A brick would fall.

& once enough bricks where on the ground

for me to see his face.

I too,

Began to fall.

Until there was nothing left.

Nothing left in the world.

But Him and I

and a pile of bricks.

He spoke to me in ways friends would.

So I believe I was safe. 

As he sweet talked his way into my life,

a place he never deserved to be.

He discretely build up another wall. 

I was to blind to even notice.

Until. He suddenly was no longer there.

I tried to look for him.

But the wall kept me from getting very far.

So I tried to break free.

But it was near impossible.

For this time. The wall was made of plexi glass,

instead of stone. 

I threw my fists at that glass for months and months and months.

Until it broke my bones I pushed on that wall,

wanting nothing more to be freed. 

then finally.

As I watched the first piece of class crack.

I realized it was me all along.

Not Him.

I built this wall.

This guard. 

Like packing peanuts or bubble wrap.

To protect something fragile.

This wall.

The wall He wasn't willing to take down.

Even if it meant freeing me.

Me. 

The builder. 

As I opened the glass,

free as a bird I ran.

I ran to find him.

But soon stopped myself in my tracks.

For if I wasn't worth the fight, why should he be?

So instead. I turned to face the trap,

that once made me weak.

And chose to be thankful, and once I did.

I looked at my hands,

and found not one scratch.